Today I googled the easiest ways to die, my search led me to a self esteem help page instead…How ironic…It told me instead of killing myself that I should kill my old life and start a new which is too true, however that only works if others don’t hold the past against you and let you move forward….

I am no longer afraid of death like I used to be, when I was a child I used to have nightmares about dying in my sleep. Crying myself to sleep out of fright, so I would sleep with the light or tv on to keep me company, as the dark made death seem so much closer, its only as I got older that I stopped doing this.
Now I am only scared that after my efforts, I might still be here and I will have even failed at that…