Hope everyone is ok, its been a real busy week for me but definitely one of growth and reflection.
On Monday I met with Camilla of Kids company, which turned out to be an adventure and a half, when I turned up at the wrong one of their two offices with half an hour to get to the right one eeeek! After arriving at the right office, I finally met her in her amazing Aladdin’s cave looking office my eyes were everywhere it was beautiful. She is an awesome and very sweet person, who told me I was an inspiration which really blew me away, because to me, that is what she is. Watch this space, but we will be doing some work with them to support children affected by DV in the coming future. Yay!
I also did my first lecture on Childhood domestic violence on Tuesday and I was petrified to tell the truth. I’ve done many talks since starting Free Your Mind, but this for some reason felt bigger. One because it was an actual lecture to potential primary school (in a real lecture theater lol) so I needed to make sure that I provided valuable knowledge and information, which would help them understand the effects of childhood DV that could help them if ever they came across a child who was doing through it.
True to the comedy card I was handed at birth, on the way to the lecture, my sat nav switched off on me, I got a flat tyre and I ran out of petrol on the way! Imagine! but somehow I made it JUST on time. I walked in flustered and nervous to a full room, but delivered the lecture which felt like it was over in a flash!
I honestly so felt proud to be able to speak on an issue which means so much to me. I am determined to many do more of these things and speak out more on this issue, not only from a personal perspective but on an informational perspective to help others to understand what Childhood domestic violence is and how it effects people. Due to my fluster I didn’t capture any pictures like I wanted to, I’m just glad that it was well received. They’ve invited me back to do more so it must have gone well. It was a very proud moment when i think back to where I was only in 2012 I would NEVER have imagined getting an opportunity like this, after all the people who told me I wasn’t good enough, I think they would be shocked to see where I am now.
On Thursday I went back to the church where the idea for Free Your Mind was born, for a photo shoot based on my story. A church called St Ethelburgas, a beautiful quaint and peaceful place, where I met someone that triggered me to think a lot about my life in a peaceful and open way, she got me to address many demons, but to also think about how my life could be if I made peace with those demons. I was extremely mentally unwell at this point in my life, suicidal, wracked with guilt, on anti depressants blood pressure tablets and full of self hate, but she was the person who told me that ‘writing helps you to confront who you are’. At that point I had just started this blog and had no idea where it was going or what I was doing with it, but the moment she said that Free Your Mind was born, I knew that writing to heal was something I wanted to help others to also do.
She is now a someone I can call a friend and I am so very thankful to her. It was very surreal to go back to the church where it all began, but it did feel like going back home. <3 I hope to be able to share some pictures from that day soon, but for now I just have this selfie 🙂
All I can say is that believing in yourself and that your life can genuinely change whilst taking small steps can move mountains for you. Having people around you that GENUINELY care about you getting better is also a big part. I know that when we are going through hard times, it can be hard to think of these things possible, but I want you to know that it is. Just go into the 2012 -2013 archives of this blog and see where I used to be.
Sending Lots of love to you today and for this coming week. xXx