This week has been brilliant but hard work and by the end of it I’ve come down with a chesty head cold. It’s taken me forever to finish this
blog because my head is pretty congested and I’ve not been able to concentrate
on much, but I wanted to make sure I achieved something today!
If this week has taught me anything, it’s how far I have
come but also how much I needed to something to make me stop and take stock. I
always felt like the world would end if I took time away from Free Your Mind
and this week I had no choice as I was invited on retreat through Unltd an
awarding body that I won an award from in November 2014.
I was really anxious to go, in the lead up to it I thought
about dropping out numerous times as I’ve not gone anywhere where I didn’t know
anyone else to stay since I got sick (with mental illness) in 2011, so this was
a big step for me.
My fears were totally eased once I got to The National
College of Teaching and Leadership in Nottingham after a train journey and trip
to the place with a friendly Taxi driver who sang the praises about the place. A
really futuristic looking building where I was welcomed by the lovely team who
would be leading the retreat, given a goody bag and checked into my room, which
I expected to look like a dorm, but it was a lovely hotel like room which they
have within the building. I was there with about 20 other award winners and
over the course of the week I really got to know some of them well, we worked
super hard 9 am until 8.30 pm, ate lots of nice food and had some really fun
moments and laughs. We had some really good workshops one included a brilliant org
called the Beatfreeks, I totally loved them they had great energy and looked at
different ways that we could share our stories and we did some ‘Free writing’
which I love doing. What was most surprising that one of them knew about Free
Your Mind and my story which was incredible; I admit that it did make me feel
I’m SO glad that I went along, the experience was invaluable,
so much so that I didn’t want to come back! I learned a lot of new things which
I can put in my work with Free Your Mind, but most importantly that feeling the
fear and doing it anyway always serves me well in the end. I learned that I am
not as socially awkward as I thought (I’m still slightly awkward though) LOL
I want anyone to know who has gone through childhood trauma
or mental illness or experienced their whole life breaking down that, good
things are possible and I know it and if you know my story you know it.
It occurred to me that throughout my life no matter what happened
there was always a little part of me that always felt like I wanted my life to
be better than it was. I used to daydream about a different life all the time,
I didn’t always have a plan of what or how, but I think that tiny bit of hope
is what has got me here today and kept me going. I still have SO FAR long to
go, but if anything I hope that reading this gives you that hope that your life
can be better.
Write down what you want and then take the next step of
thinking about how, take your time to do this and explore your mind don’t rush
it because ultimately what you want is real naked honesty about how you see
your life at its best. Just seeing it that way in writing can be a powerful
thing, which will hopefully lead to then making small changes daily to make it
I got home and woke up the next day unwell, which was
rubbish we worked really hard over the week so I think I’d become a little run
down. It still doesn’t dampen an amazing experience, but a little
reminder to look after myself better going forwards.
Keep dreaming that your life can be better than it is,
follow your dreams and don’t be afraid to DREAM BIG. The biggest step you
can take is to find the courage to live the life of your dreams and no horrible
past can stop that from happening for you when you believe.
Your dreams know the way, and one day your dreams and
reality will collide.
Have a wonderful week, Lots of love xXx