Ive been struggling for inspiration for days, lack of motivation and that PUSH that gives you the fuel to do what you need to do with passion…Then I had a conversation with my 10 year old sister this morning, she told me about her friendships at school in reference to someone she calls her BFF (thats best friend forever to the rest of us…lol) she wasnt sure if her BFF had stopped being her ‘BFF’ and was confused, the childish angst displayed through her words and naivety made me smile along with my own thoughts of the trials of friendship that ive had myself.
I told her ’ never take the term BFF too seriously all you really need is GOOD friends family and yourself, even if you have one good friend that is better than 5 friends who are constantly your BFF one day and not the other.
She replied bemused ‘how can i be best friends with myself’ I laughed her statement with a ‘you have alot to learn thought in my head’
Throughout my life ive made ALOT of friends and most of those friendships have either filtered into acquaintanceship or are now non existent, leaving me with quite a small circle, and this is no bad thing.
Its only in the late of life and probably after some experiences that you come to realise that being your own best friend is essential.
‘You might not understand this now i explained to her, but in your life you will make many friends some might become you bff some you may consider just a friend, one day that bff may decide for whatever reason that they dont want that friendship with you anymore. It is sad and you should learn from it but how you prepare for this is by realising that YOU must be YOUR own best friend, You must love yourself and like yourself first and don’t let the conflict of others drown that out’
If youve read my blog from the beginning you will be aware of the ups and downs of the friendships Ive had throughout my life. I know it will be essential for my sister to discover those things by herself and have her own experiences, but I think child or adult, we need to understand that love cannot come to you if you do not love yourself first. I want her to not be conceited but to know this.
Without experiencing the ups and downs of friendship would i have never learned the need to be my own best friend, I based my own self esteem and worth on the acceptance of other people and when they took that away It destroyed me.
When I hit rock bottom I was the only person who could pick myself back up, of course i had the help of some amazing friends of family, but the decision to change my life and get back up was ME!
This is your journey no one else is living the same life as you , is you, or is on the same path as you, and this is what makes us ALL individually special.
So when the inadequacies of friendships and relationships come along we will not forget who we are. Regardless of what is said or done and remember our own individual worth and not every friendship is supposed to last for life.
I truly believe that some relationships come to serve us as lessons. I hope I can instil this into my sister so whilst she may go through her own trials she hopefully wont forget her own worth throughout. Its all about learning and passing on the lessons…